Cracks on my forehead

Recently my three year old asked why I had cracks on my forehead. After a quick explanation of the nature of wrinkles and an anti-aging shopping spree, I came to a realization: the more I worry the bigger my cracks get but am I really doing anybody any good? The answer is quite obvious, not at all.

You see, it is human nature to think that we are in charge; we are the ones spinning the wheels, making things happen. Because of this, we think we are responsible for all failure and success, for things getting done or not, when in fact none of it is in our hands. Sure, we can’t sit back and watch the world zoom by. I am not by any means advocating laziness but rather trying to remind us that the burden does not lie not in our hands. No, rather what is in our hands are the tools, the time, and the ability to put forth our best effort. Most importantly, in our hands lay the foundations of a prayer life that will bring us closer to God, that will shelter us beneath His wings, that will prompt us forward when needed, and open doors when necessary. This being said, it is still very hard not to fall into this worry “trap”. Things happen. Life changes direction regularly and without warning, leaving many of us, particularly those of us who are creatures of habit, panting for breath before we begin sprinting in the new direction. When this happens I do what almost every woman does: I worry and I talk.

I worry and talk, and worry and talk, until all of a sudden two things dawn on me. I am not in charge after all. The only thing I am in charge of is remembering that I am not in charge and turning my heart toward the One who is. And the One in charge, the One who loves me best, desires only to bless me beyond my wildest dream. These two things I know as hard facts. This does not mean everyday goes perfectly smoothly, that I have all the answers or that I have completely stopped worrying and exist in a state of constant peace. It does mean, when things change or go wrong, I know that “although today He prunes my twigs with pain, yet doth His blood nourish and warm my root; Tomorrow I shall put forth buds again and clothes myself in fruit.” (Christina Georgina Rossetti)

Though the desires of my heart may fluctuate His are constant. He desires nothing more or less than me: to love me, to bless me, to spend time with me. So I will no longer furrow my brow in worry creating cavernous creases along my forehead. Instead I will cup my hands and direct them to the One I love, ready to receive whatever blessings He may have for me.